


Ex

by PlantsWearPants



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-30
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-11-21 11:08:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11356251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlantsWearPants/pseuds/PlantsWearPants
Summary: “No, we didn't date. Technically he isn't an ex-boyfriend. But he is an ex-something, an ex-maybe. An ex-almost."





	Ex

Renjun was sitting on the armchair wrapped in blanket. He wasn't paying attention to the film that he was supposed to watch with his friend. Instead he was staring at two boys on the sofa, cuddling and kissing. They weren't focused on the movie too.

Renjun feels something in his heart. Even if it is breaking over and over again it hurts the same. Every time he sees the pair snuggling and hugging or simply holding hands he can't help but feels the pain. It's like a fresh wound no matter how long ago this whole thing has started. He feels like it was yesterday. He's still jealous, he still thinks he has a chance, he has hope. And that's what destroying him little by little. He can't get over him. He means too much.

“Injunie, you okay?” he looks at the boy sitting on the floor beside him. He sends him a sad smile.

“As always.” he says to Mark. He knows older is worried. Renjun doesn't have to explain anything, he's like opened book so easy to read. “Don't worry, hyung.” Mark looks back at the television. The film is ending.

“You can talk to me.” he adds. Younger only nods but he knows the other didn't see it.

The movie ends everyone gets up from they sits. Chenle and Jisung almost run to the kitchen saying they're going to prepare the dinner. Donghyuck fell asleep on the other armchair. Jeno and Jaemin leave the living room and go to the Jeno's room.

“What's going on with you and Jeno?” Mark asks not looking at younger.

 

_Renjun stands in front of the class. He's nervous, his palms are sweaty. So many eyes are looking at him._

“ _H-hi. I'm Huang Renjun and I'll be in your class from now on. Nice to meet you.” he manges to say. He looks up. Some students are smiling, some nods, some don't even look at him._

“ _Please sit down. There's a place next to the window.” says the teacher and Renjun walks towards it slowly. He hates being in the centre of attention. The boy sits down and the lesson starts._

_The new school seems nice. It's bigger than the one he was going to back in China. He wonders if the people are nice and if the food is eatable. The lesson is pretty interesting, Renjun likes biology. He looks through the window and notices that the weather is nice. It's sunny but not awfully hot._

_When bell rings he packs his things and stands up. He's about to leave the class when he hears someone saying “Hi.” behind him. He turns around and sees a boy. Very pretty boy, around his height, dark hair, warm smile. “I'm Jeno.” says the stranger and smiles even wider. “Nice to meet you.”_

“ _Hello.” replies shyly the boy “You already know I'm Renjun. Nice to meet you too.”_

“ _You know where we have next class?” he asks but deep inside he know the answer is no._

“ _Ah... I'm not sure.” Renjun laughs awkwardly. He's not good at meeting new people._

“ _Come on, I'll show you.” says dark-haired student and walks out of the room. Chinese follows him._

 

“It's... complicated.” he replies.

“I don't doubt.” starts Mark. “He asked me yesterday why you don't talk to him lately. I didn't know what to say.”

“I... It just hurts more than I expected.” he feels something in his throat.

“What?” asks slowly older.

“Him and Jaemin.” Renjun pauses. There's silence between them for a few seconds.

“So... you and Jeno? You were a thing?” Mark doesn't sound surprised.

“No, we didn't date.” he starts.

 

“ _You have to go with us!” says Jeno enthusiastically._

“ _But I don't really know anyone beside you and Donghyuck.” replies Renjun. It's been a month since he moved to Korea. He mostly hangs out with Jeno, sometimes with Donghyuck because they have classes together. He heard about the rest of their friends but never actually met or talk to them. “What if they don't like me?”_

“ _You worry too much. They're gonna love you, I swear. Why are you such a pessimist?” Renjun doesn't say anything. Maybe Jeno's right._

_In the evening they all meet in front of the cinema. The boy greets the others. They seem really nice. Chenle and Jisung are a little loud, Donghyuck is clinging to Mark and Jaemin smiles all the time, just like Jeno._

“ _Actually, I don't even know what film we're going to watch.” he says to Jeno when they're walking to the cinema hall. The title that he hears doesn't tell him anything. He sits down between Jeno and Mark. After ten minutes he finds out it's a horror._

_Renjun shudders at almost every jumpscare and covers his eyes with hands every five seconds. He comes closer to Jeno and at some point hugs his side. The other doesn't protest but hides his head in Renjun's neck when something scary happens. They glued to each other for the rest of the movie. After the film ends they walk out of the cinema and don't talk about what happened inside the building._

 

“Technically he isn't an ex-boyfriend”

 

_They sit on Renjun's bed trying to study._

“ _I need a break or I'll die.” announces Jeno and closes his book._

“ _You had a break ten minutes ago.” replies older opening the other boy's book._

“ _They say that person can focus only for seven minutes.” he murmurs and pouts. Renjun's heart skips a beat. Jeno's just too cute to handle._

“ _Then good luck with the exams” says Chinese. Black-haired boy looks at him with puppy eyes._

“ _Please?” he starts and Renjun knows he lost. “I know you're hungry...”_

“ _Okay. But only to eat.”_

“ _Of course, captain!” Jeno stands up quickly and goes to the kitchen. Renjun follows him slowly. He's not sure why he feels like this around the other. All those skipped heart beats, blushes when he hears a complement from Jeno, weird feeling inside his stomach when younger smiles. They're friends for months, why does he feel like this? He looks at the boy in front of him and sighs. Being around him is so nice. He really like hanging out with Jeno. It's probably because they're friends, nothing more._

 

“but he's an ex-something”

 

_Renjun comes back from the shower and sees Jeno playing on his phone._

“ _Shower's all yours.” he says putting his clothes on the chair. He folds it when Jeno's standing up. Renjun's staying at Jeno's for a sleepover. They were playing on xbox and eating junk food all evening and now older doesn't feel very well. He sits on the bed looking at the other's room. He's been here thousands of times. The room feels like home to Renjun. Everything is so familiar: the furniture, the photos on the walls, the smell but he never slept here. He lays down on the mattress leaving his feet on the floor. He's tired so he almost falls asleep._

“ _Goodnight, sleeping beauty” he hears a laugh a few minutes later. Jeno throws his clothes to his closet and lays down next to Renjun. He's wearing sweatpants and white t-shirt._

“ _Um, it's only one night so I didn't take out the spare mattress. We can sleep in my bed if it's okay?” he asks carefully. Renjun nods blushing a little. When they're laying under the quilt Renjun looks at Jeno's face thinking the other's already asleep. It's dark in the room but he can see Jeno's face more clearly with every second. Older really wants to kiss him and doesn't want to think why this thought suddenly appeared in his mind._

“ _Stop staring and go to sleep.” Jeno whispers and Renjun stops breathing._

“ _I'm not” he murmurs and turns around. He doesn't mind when a few minutes later Jeno moves closer and wraps his arm around older's stomach._

 

“an ex-maybe”

 

_It's cold when they're standing outside of Chenle's house. It's new years eve. Renjun looks at Jeno who's talking loudly with Jaemin about something. Older feels his heart melting when the other laughs throwing his head back. He thinks maybe this year he'll have the courage to confess. What if he kissed him now? Would Jeno kiss him back? He's too afraid to try. Still not sure what black-haired boy feels towards him. He comes closer when others starts the countdown. The wind blows and Renjun regrets not taking a jacket with him._

“ _You have a new year's resolution?” asks Jeno._

“ _Yeah, I think I have.” answers Chinese smiling.”And you?”_

“ _I have one too.” They hear others counting loudly._

“ _One!” They yell together. Jeno looks at the fireworks in the sky._

“ _It's beautiful!” he says smiling._

“ _Yes.” agrees Renjun looking at the other boy's profile. The most beautiful view._

_After a few minutes the show was over. Everyone went inside the house. Just two of them were walking slowly._

“ _What's yours new year resolution?” asks Jeno. Renjun stays silent for a while.  
“To have a little bit more courage.” he says. Younger smiles._

“ _Mine's pretty similar.” says the other and walks faster to go inside the building too. He's cold._

_Renjun smiles and thinks that maybe he has a chance._

 

“an ex-almost.”

 

“ _He said yes!!” Jeno yells when he walks into Renjun's room._

“ _Wh-what? Who?” older's confused._

“ _Jaemin! I asked him out and he said yes! We have a date on Friday, oh my god. I am so happy!” Jeno says laying down on Renjun's bed. Chinese feels his heart breaking into million pieces. It's three weeks after new year and he starts to understand what Jeno meant by “mine's pretty similar”. He tries his best not to cry._

“ _So... you like Jaemin?” he's voice is a little unstable._

“ _You didn't know? Actually I never told you because I thought it's not gonna work out but look! We have a date. On no, I don't know what to wear!” he starts mumbling._

“ _I didn't know.” whispers Renjun not caring if the other hears his answer. “I'm happy for you.” he adds a little bit louder._

 

_This night he cries until he falls asleep._

 

“Hey, me and Jaemin prepared the mattresses for you to- Renjun? You're crying?” says Jeno when he walks out of the bedroom. Renjun touches his cheek. It's wet.

“No, no. It's nothing.” he says.

“What happened?” asks younger worriedly. He comes closer and put his hand on older's shoulder.

“Don't.” Renjun replies sharply. He feels so awful. He just wants to cry and forget about his feelings, about Jeno, about everything. He stands up from the armchair and runs towards the bathroom ignoring his name being called over and over again.

Jeno wants to go after him but Mark stops him.

“Leave it, Jeno” he says and walks away. Jeno only hears quiet sobs coming from the bathroom when he sits down to eat the dinner. Renjun comes out of the bathroom and sits with the others. His eyes red and puffy but nobody says anything. Jeno looks at him like he wants to asks if he's alright but Renjun breaks the eye contact. Nothing's alright.

 

_He'll get over Jeno, one day. Just not today._

 


End file.
